short story

When i first took off on this journey i didn't expect it to be so confusing..Life for me isn't as simple as how its portrayed on TV, there's always such a happy oh how lovely ending. But my life,my life is past lovely and nowhere near happy. I'm only 17 and my steps toward woman hood aren't going as planned. My mom and I should be so close but we can barely sit in the same room with each other, my brother is her favorite such a spoiled brat but all she see's is perfect despite his minor run-ins with the law and recent introduction to sex at the age of 20 but that do sent stop "Angela"from worshiping the very ground he walks on, and there's me Janel rose MacArthur, how can I even describe myself. To other I'm just so beneath them, a doormat if you could call it that. I use to be so high spirited but in a household like this there's no such thing as happy. Mother and son might as well be the Brady Bunch leaving me to be the damn maid, But i guess that's the role  I was meant to play.It's the beginning of the school year which surprisingly I was looking forward too since my summer was spent getting yelled at by Angela, thanks to her titty sucking son, Ugh how I fathom the thought of him leaving the nest, so much excitement feels me then I come back to reality, he's not going anywhere. I lost my privilege of making new friends..keep in mind I did just relocate states a couple months ago,but friends were out of the question especially if little big brother had an issue.How can saying Hi and nothing after wards lead you to not liking someone? But in the famous words of Angela "'Whatever Bobby wants Bobby gets", that wasn't her exact words but man everything she says fits into that so unorthodox quote. Home was like modern day hell so any chance an extracurricular activity popped up I was there, The longer I could avoid going home the better. Sitting in the living room has got to be the most awkward so called family bonding ever. Angela even reads the newspaper with an attitude glaring at me like I cant feel her piercing glares. Not only can I feel her glares I can see her put of my peripheral . Bobby's secluded in the room giving Angela more reason to spoil him more for no reason and for her to slam the paper and tear me a new ass for Bobby's  'I do it just because" mood swings. Ugh then Angela starts to speak "you know I'm upset" what else is new I say under my breathe. She continues rant with "your brother this your brother that". I lean my head back open my book and proceed to tune her out. All I hear are mumbles a couple of high pitched curse words. I close my book say OK and make my way upstairs. Bobby opens his door laughs in my face and bumps me switches to pity face mode and heads down to mom with a lie packed story of how i made him feel less of himself..Can I even call my room a sanctuary , massive holes in the walls, I'm just waiting  for some type of creature to crawl threw. A black and white 72' TV not to mention the sound do sent work but hey who needs sound when I can just enjoy the yells of Angela ha ha not. Speaking of Angela I can over hear her bashing me while Bobby's nodding his head in agreement. Who died and made him prince? Oh yeah dad did die well not literally just figuratively , Dad left wen I was six . I remember him pulling me aside telling me he could only take so much and if that insane mother of yours would let me take you, you know I would. That was the last time dad ever came to mind except for at this moment. Angela was always filling my head with lies about him..as for Bobby's dad he was the modern deadbeat in and out speaking of him was a sin in our house..well that's how Angela made it seem. While the Brady bunch are enjoying there dinner I'm upstairs gazing up at imaginary stars and planets wondering am I the only one living like this, did my being born ruin everyone's life am I the reason for more bad things to come? Here I go with the negative thoughts again. It's not like I'm emo but more or less I am sad most the time, So that's what brings me to counseling. OK so what I failed to mention was the fact I was diagnosed with depression at the 14. I always felt empty, but depression isn't that a bit extreme. Angela yelled about that too. "why are you depressed "you have no reason to be" going on about how I need to fix my attitude yet I haven't said anything to her. " I hope you can get on anti-depressants because your starting to work my nerve !" Wow Angela such a nice thing to say to your depressed daughter..IDIOT. All I could do was think back on my adolescence, but I cant even  remember that being good either. Angela and Bobby text each other. Bobby's a snitch plain and simple, Bobby text Angela told her about Tracy, one of the many friends I cant have. No real reason why they didn't like her just wanna see me crumble , and that's what I started to do. Can someone tell me what lonely feels like looks like?? Am I what lonely looks like? Fragile,sad eyes brown skin, seldom face. Does lonely feel angry,sad with an ounce of blood tinged tears? Will I feel this way forever because that's a long time. Monday mornings are quite easy, get up shower,no breakfast on the bus to school.There was a new kid, light skin green eyes  curly hair the most handsome  face Ive ever seen. Of course every girl A-Z was all over him. But would he want with someone like me? I'm nowhere near his type ha hes not even close to being mine, Why am I kidding myself he's perfect and that's exactly my type. New boy made his way over to an empty seat next to mine. He introduces himself "Hey I'm Malcolm" extends his hand expecting a handshake in return. I shake his hand  knowing he can feel  the nervous sweat. "I'm Janel" "you nervous?" no why you ask, Your palms are sweating. I chuckle trying to play it off but it's that very second my face turns red and I excuse myself to the ladies room.

take on the homeless

Poverty is at it's all time high in this day in age.While many peopl are not affected as some. Whenever you leave your house you can see at least 3 or more homeless people, but insead of having any compassion for them most people contine moving on about there day..turning the other cheek.When you come down that same street lter on that day do you wonder were that individual has gone or if there okay? Do you feel any type of way towards thst situation? hmm probly not. Most americans are quick t belittle the less fortunate regardless what the situation may be.While you americans sit up in your homes  taking for granted everything you have there are people struggling for half the things you take for granted. just dont understand how you can look at your fellow amerian and not have any compassion for them, not try and offer any type of help or even words of encouragment. CHANGE OF SUBJECT_____ my opinion on the badges for the homeless.. I feel theyre a daily reminder made by the goverment to make them feel even less about themselves.They have to walk around with abadge stating there homeless in ordr to recieve anything.. madde by the goverment. you can make a legal badge stating there homeless but you cant  help them out financially.The goverment has money togive but just throwing it away to bullhshit polticians and there camps!!!